Truth or Dare?
by thepragmatist
Summary: SasuNaru. Naruto learns that the most impossible thing is to play truth and dare with Sasuke. Stupid Sasuke. oneshot


**Truth or Dare?**

**Warning:** Yaoi, SasuNaru, perverted Sasuke.

**Author's notes: **Some random one shot, somewhat crack-ish. But I can't write crack, (or anything long) so this is just a short, pointless fluff-ish oneshot (short enough to be a drabble)

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Naruto used to believe that the most difficult thing in the world was going a week without ramen. But now he knew it was something far far more impossible.

Playing truth and dare with Sasuke.

The bastard would start with teasing Naruto mercilessly, telling him that just because he played the 'uke' part in the relationship, doesn't mean he actually had to indulge in twelve year old girl sleepover games.

Naruto always countered by asking Sasuke if he would really fuck a twelve year old girl.

And his response would be a rough kiss and a grope. Sasuke said it was to prove that Naruto was the only one he would fuck.

But Naruto thinks that Sasuke just automatically responds to the word 'fuck'.

But in the end, Naruto and Sasuke would always end up on the floor, starting the game.

Now here comes the most impossible part.

Every time Naruto asked Sasuke 'Truth or Dare' Sasuke would pick truth, merely because he was lazy, which provided no amusement to Naruto whatsoever. He had so many wonderfully embarrassing dares just _waiting_ to be used. But alas, Sasuke always picked truth. The lazy bastard.

Lazy _and_ horny.

Naruto would soon find out.

"Sasuke? Truth or Dare"

"Truth"

Naruto sat pondering and pouting. He _really_ wanted Sasuke to pick dare. He had the 'Hi I'm SasUKE' sign all ready and everything.

"Ok…What's you're darkest deepest fantasy? What do you masturbate to?" Naruto asked evilly. Perfect blackmail material.

"I don't masturbate."

Naruto deadpanned. "Liar!" Crossing his arms huffily, Naruto glared at Sasuke. "EVERYONE masturbates!"

"I don't masturbate…" Sasuke repeated. "Because I have you to pound into the mattress."

Naruto's eyes widened as he flushed red.

But being the innocent idiot he is, he simply assumed that since the question was a pretty perverted one, there wasn't anything wrong with a…perverted answer in return.

But as the game continued, and Sasuke continued to pick truth, he realized that Sasuke didn't need a messed question to be perverted.

"What's your favorite past time?" Naruto asked lazily. He had run out of questions, there was only so much he wanted to know about the Uchiha.

"Fucking you."

"What's your favorite color?"

"White, the color I see when I fuck you."

"What's you favorite foo-" naruto stopped, noticing the look on Sasuke's face. "Nevermind."

Sasuke smirked.

But every time Sasuke asked him a question, it wasn't much better. He would pick truth in fear of Sasuke making him do something stupid. If Sasuke wouldn't pick dare, neither would he. But the questions Sasuke asked all seemed to have something in common…

"Who's your boyfriend?"

"Sasuke."

"Who was your first kiss?"

"Sasuke."

"Who was your second kiss?"

"Sasuke."

"Who was your third kiss?"

"Sasuke."

"Who was your fourth kiss?"

"Gaara."

"WHAT!" Sasuke fumed jealousy overcoming him.

"Kidding, Kidding. It was Sasuke."

His emotionless mask was back on. "It better be."

But about 20 perverted questions and answers later, Naruto gave up.

"Naruto, Truth or Dare?"

"Dare!" Naruto declared, glaring straight at Sasuke. _There! I did it. We're going to complete a dare whether you like it or not!_

Sasuke narrowed his eyes, an emergency meeting occurring in his head. He could either dare Naruto to do some kinky and then fuck him, or he could just piss him off a bit, get him riled up. And then fuck him. Seeing the determined look in Naruto's eyes, Sasuke smirked.

"Ok… I dare you to…"

Naruto waited. _He's going to make me dress up isn't he? Or strip tease! Or…or…_Naruto's head spun with perverted possibilities.

"…pick truth."

Naruto gaped. "WHAT!"

"Answer Naruto, who's your seme."

Naruto sighed. "Sasuke."

Sasuke smirked contentedly. "That's right."

"Sasuke? Truth or Dare?"

"Dare."

Naruto's eyes widened. "REALLY!"

"No."

Sasuke found it incredibly amusing the way Naruto banged his head against the wall.

"Truth, idiot"

"Fine…Fine…" Naruto said dejectedly, before his eyes lit up as a plan came to him.

"I TRUTH you to pick dare!" Naruto declared smugly.

"…what? Loser, that doesn't make any sense."

Naruto pouted. "I don't want to play anymore."

Sasuke smirked. _Works every time…_

"Hey, Hey! Sasuke! Let's play twister!" Naruto yelled eagerly, already setting up the mat.

As Sasuke took the position given to him, he gave Naruto a superior sneer. "Another girlish sleepover game, dobe?"

"Twister is not girlish!" Naruto's pink tongue poked out as he tried to get in the position that happened to be right under Sasuke's.

"You really are a uke."

"SHUT U-" But Naruto was cut off when Sasuke fell on him, and proceeded to ravish him silly.

Ok, playing truth or dare may be hard. But playing twister with the bastard is damn near impossible.

Especially since the bastard finds every single damn pose to be an invitation for sex.

Stupid Sasuke.

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**AN:** Well that was perverted for me. I never typed 'fuck' so many times. please **review**


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